woman drivers

We were barreling down the highway that lead to the mill outlet where we would buy those comfy, thick cotton clothes for school. School actually began in autumn back then. Even though it doesn't get very cold down here, (it snowed a lot more back then) I was going to get a jersey with a number on it and would have worn it, long-sleeved in July. The mill was on a river and there were a lot of friendly women there. Apollo got to sit in the front seat because he always got the best of everything, right beside Katherine the Greatest, and Mom liked to keep us separated. Of course, my hyper-active little body needed as much room as possible. We were only a few miles out of town and a long way from anywhere and approaching the rock store that stood alone at a wide open crossroad. Unseatbelted, my chin was planted on the soft top of the front seat, juxtaposed to Katherine's crown. My cousin, Bacchus, had just taught me how to take the Lord's name in vain with umph and I was burning to impart my learning in public. I saw the car totally ignore the stop sign because I always kept an eye on the rock store with the hope that a troll or dragon would one day eventually exit.
"Zeusdamn," said I with umph.
I never was really impressed by Bruce Lee. I saw and felt Mom hit my forehead, cheek, and shoulder in less than half a nanosecond with sledgehammer force while never veering between a yellow and white line and bringing a speeding icm to a pillow soft stop. A guy named Billy once said something cute about hell, fury and a scorned woman. I would have rather been with fifty scorned women at that moment. My little heart just gave up on me knowing that we, my heart and I, really didn't have much future left. What was the point in even beating? Somehow we did live though and eventually made it to the mill. As soon as we got inside I ran up and after she smiled, hugged one of the friendly women.
I never was afraid of anything again. Many people asked,
"Endymion, aren't you afraid of anything?" Quietly, I would shrug my shoulders in response. I had seen the most fearsome force in the universe and lived. I've kept a cautious, though respectful eye on women ever since. I learned that day that women can drive faster, smoother and safer than any man ever dreamed. Woe, be unto him who thinketh not.